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I am so alone, there is no one here beside me...
yaafter
nika_ru
This is a very special post for ismira because I feel so guilty when I write in Russian all the time. BTW, I want to complain about shmakamy sister.

I travelled a lot and I lived in different places and there was a certain period in my life when I thought that home is basically everywhere. Everywhere where I have my glasses, my lense container and where I fall asleep. I even considered a hotel to be home if I stayed there for a week.
Then I suddenly realized that home which is everywhere is basically nowhere. And then I found different stuff that makes me feel home. Home is where my laptop is. I officially moved to my boyfriend's apartment June 30th last year because I brought my laptop here. Another thing that makes me feel really home is a CUP. I usually have a cup that makes me feel very special. For many years I had a cup from Guzel, my schoolmate, painted with beautiful drum kit. Roger Taylor from Queen is a drummer, if you remember such things. At my place in Moscow I had a very special cup with Lord of the rings characters (for some reason nastuch thought I am a fan and I didn't argue).

And now when I try to take my favorite cup from my parents' place (the one with Tweety that ismira gave me) I find out that shmakamy sister is desperately in love with it! This is her very special cup and I don't know what do to about it. I know that now I can't take it away because it will make me feel guilty everytime I drink tea (and I drink a lot of tea, guys!).

I bought myself a huge cup and I am trying my best to start feeling something special about it.

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Vera, you know, when you have something without permission you feel happy. I know that you value this CUP, you like it because it make you feel home. It will be very cruel from my side not to return it to you... Okay, my dear sister, you can take it away Because... I must have my own cup, my own feeling of home...

OK. Let's say I am buying you a new cup. Will it make you feel special about it?

Hey! You know, I had my favourite cup at home but now it is in Ezhkova's flat. She will bring it back and I will be happy! =)

And I find myself thinking that I'm at home everywhere. Even when there's nowhere to sleep. The best thing is that I don't need more than 1 hour to adapt - at least when I circulate between Tambov and Moscow. Or any other city. Makes me feel comfortable and confident.

I think this is a very dangerous feeling. There should be a place on earth when one should feel ESPECIALLY HOME.

awwww! you make ismira all teary eyed!!!

In the morning I'll make wafles!!! just for you!!! HUGS!!!!

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